Daisy Wants a Baby

A little something for your Monday . . .

The dogs have been behaving horribly lately. Sure, it's probably our fault for not being home with them enough, but our bigger dog, Daisy, figured out how to break out of her crate. This is a problem. 

The first day she broke free, she was prompted by some sort of stomach bug and just pooped everyyywherrreeee. 

We made some adjustments to our sophisticated crating system (i.e., turned the door against the wall and utilized a different door), and yet she still broke free. On this day, no poop. No real damage either, save one exception: she chewed up my basal thermometer.

The following day we really didn't make any adjustments. Just lazy. So of course, she broke free yet again. This time she chewed up by beloved NFP charts on my nightstand. Probably a year's worth of paper charts. Chart blizzard all over the bedroom. It looked a bit like this:

 "mwah ha ha ha"

 

Daisy is sending a clear message: she wants a baby. She really showed us what she thinks of those sympto-thermal rules! But if this is Daisy's way of showing she wants a baby brother or sister, she is going about it all wrong. This behavior will not be tolerated.

(Besides, it hurts our feelings that she doesn't like her puppy, Ace. We got him for you, Daisy! Isn't he enough?)

We exacted her punishment, which was appropriate and proportionate to the offense committed. It involved pantyhose and looked like this:

The outtakes: 

duckface

Still love her.

(If you think this is cruel, she also got into my makeup.) We hope she learns from this very public humiliation to express herself in a more productive way. 

We will make great parents.